Are You the Architect or the Tenant of Your Life?
The difference between a life by design and a life by default.
She had the job everyone wanted. Think of it as a penthouse apartment on the 50th floor of her favorite skyscraper. The view was incredible, the address was impressive, and the keycard was proof she had made it. Everything was included, from the sleek furniture to the pre-approved art on the walls.
But she found herself walking through the rooms like she was in a museum. She appreciated the design, but she didn't choose it. She had a life that looked perfect from the outside.
So why did she feel like a guest in it?
The feeling crystallized during a Tuesday morning meeting. She was presenting a flawless quarterly review, using charts that glowed on the big screen. Everyone was nodding.
This was her design, her work.
But then she looked past the conference table, out the massive window at the city below. And she realized she was just decorating a single room in a skyscraper someone else owned. She was polishing their windows to perfect their view.
That’s when it hit her. The problem wasn't the furniture. It was the floor plan. She had to stop trying to rearrange a life she didn't design.
So she left the penthouse. She traded the keycard for a blank sheet of paper. A blueprint for a life that did not exist yet.
The silence was terrifying. There were no more meetings to fill the calendar, no more goals set by others. Just an empty space and the paralyzing freedom to build anything. People warned her about the risk, the lack of security. They told her the penthouse was a sure thing.
For months, all she did was draw. She designed a foundation made of her non negotiables. She drew windows where she needed light, not where a floor plan dictated. It was quiet, invisible work.
Years later, people ask her what she built. It’s not a skyscraper. It’s a single story home with a sprawling garden.
Her office has glass doors that open to the outside, because she works best with fresh air. There’s a large kitchen in the center of it all, because her creativity is fueled by hosting others. Her most productive hours are early in the morning, so she built a library facing east, a room designed to catch the sunrise.
It’s not as tall as the penthouse. It doesn't have the same address. But the sunlight that fills the rooms is entirely her own.
A job can give you a room with a great view. It’s safe and secure, and that is a beautiful thing.
But if you ever feel like a guest in your own life, remember you hold the pen. You are allowed to be the architect. You can design a foundation, build your own walls, and create a space where your work and your soul can finally live together.
Don’t just accept the floor plan. Dare to draw your own.
Dilia Wood is the founder of No Cubicle No Cry, a publication dedicated to helping people transition to entrepreneurship. You can find more of her work, tools, and resources at diliawood.com. and blog.diliawood.com